Thursday, 4 July 2013

a sad little thought

Hi all, sorry for the long delay. It started with half term, then ended with Ed being poorly, and then we had a sunny period of the good life, not a lot of screaming or pooing, or biting or screaming or such like. We had smiles, and trying to play like a real boy (joking, taking the line from shrek) and eating, yes eating. My wee fella has a tiny wee tummy, and his tummy button instead of being an out-e is a flat-e (not quite enough tummy for an in-e). And then my ego kinda kicked in about how well I was managing him blah blah blah and then boom! Back to screaming, opening and slamming the front door and poohs in the bath. And we're back to our strange normal. He tried to get me up the other day at 5am in the morning, anyone who knows me knows that was never going to happen, but he woke me up enough to completely bugger up my sleep, then he falls fast asleep and is a grumpy bugger in the morning. It feels like 1 step forward, 1 step back.

Here's the sad thought, after pulling Toms hair for some unknown reason, Tom says that maybe we should get some of  Eds friends round, and then he wouldn't be so bored ( your see other than cleaning the floor there's nothing really that interests him) and I had to tell Tom and hear it myself that Ed doesn't have any friends. Not a single person. And the sadness and isolation that I felt for him felt like an open wound in my heart. It has roused me out of my complacent we are getting somewhere mode. I have to renew my efforts to make a difference in his life.

Promise I will post tomorrow, and to cheer myself up will list some of the stand out memories I have to prove that we have come a long way from the dark days that used to be the way we lived.

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